Wringing out the Colors

Don't tell me its real
Still you feel it
It's there
Don't tell me you feel it
Just because it's there
Always there

Trapped in glass
A fly on the wall
Just because it's there

We're nowhere
A sunbeam on the table
Like a tangle in your hair

It's something stolen
Don't tell me it's real

It's always the silence
Stirring in the pain
It's all the silence
Feeding you instead
Always in your head

I'm on the shore
Sitting in a chair
A shipwreck
In your eyes
Fallen
In your stead.

Feel it in the rhythm of
Religion's stare
Use it like a nightlight
When your cupboard's bare

In the din of voices around you
Found in the moonlight glare
My hand will melt away
And then you feel it
Just because I'm there.

Innocent

Alone, relection in the mirror, sticken
Back in the depths of time, lost
On the bottom of a lake, frozen

Through the haze of tears I remember
Your name, the one I forgot
Held me through long nights
When did I forget?

Like infinite horizons
Memories flood inwards
Foggy notions, faded laughter
If only there was a way to get back
Home, stolen years of fear
Forgiven in the end
A restless soul, just
Like me
Why leave me here?

Still here, a crumbling
Rock in an old stream
Facing the world
Like some golden fireworks
Dying slowly in the summer sky
Drifting across my young eyes
Unable to sleep again

Alone in a room full of
Friends and lovers
With no counsel
Faith in the past
When the dawn was
New
Imprisoned now
By the beauty of what was
And will never return
Again
Sweet respite like innocence
Wake me in the morn'
As the clock strikes
Last.

One-way Streets

Night stars streaming
In a view from the
Bottom of a glass
Words melting into
Lips stained
And the music
Plays on the
Tip of a tongue
Outside red lights
Dangle on her
Shoulders
Like that other
Man
Swaying to the
lurid beat
Smiling eyes
And empty mouths
Swirling in
An amber embrace
Spinning at once
The world
Released in
Fiery fists
Beating on the
Bathroom stall
While she stalks
Away in the
Early morn'
Just carry me
Home again
After one more
Drink
Tears on the
Golden sun.

Thousand-yard stare

Don't look at me again
That milky skin
And rose of red lips
Cigarette between
Spindly fingers a
Cold collection of
nights gone past
Stills in my mind
It's always the same
Smoke wreathed about
Black eyes stained
Doll arms spread about
Porcelain love
My glasses steamed
By the faucet's time and
last last night's cheap
wine
your body draped about
the old clawfoot tub
rusted away just at the
edges of
imagination
Of you in my arms
While the alarm rings
In a shiny new day
And the bed runs cold
Like blood
And you're still there
That look on your face
And the curve in your back
When I try to wake you
Against the currrent
Her face remains the same
Made a sillouhete by
God's hands
And the sirens's call
Shaken into consciousness
Bleary eyed
Stone
I awoke to death
Just like every mourning
But this was a
Dream.

Call

Feel the icy breeze, from your lips
Numb on the fingers, on the brain
Too cold to cry, yet heart on fire

In the height of sensation
In the depths of despair

Sheets of rain, layered like honey
Filtered thoughts, feast from the mind
Awake on sweaty nights, drenched in pain

On the horizon clouds plush
On the inside clenched fists

Strike hard against the hourglass
Against the wall held up
Up by feelings of hollow joy
Against a wall we can't
Climb up but keep on trying
Like a prisoner of glass
Dying in the afterglow
Take in broken smiles
Din of sullen eyes
Forgotten lust
Say goodbye
My dear.

Sinewy Burnouts (Writer's Block)

Wrenching playing hatred upon the masses
the ghouls and dragons of the mind melting
the one pure thing I had left
grinding my bones into dust
flaying the sacred places of the heart
pounding my way through the glass
windows my brain on fire
can't begin to stop the goddamned music
the same fucking tune played out over and over
again like a stitch in time
like needles in a haystack piercing every finger
every and staining the walls with pleasure
streaking across my vision the lies of everyone
I've ever known, the pain of those I've hurt
senseless anger breaking the dam
and I can't write a fucking thing about it
I can't give birth to the stars
and every frustration is kept there
locked away in a shitty cabinet
locked down in the embers of memory
disparate thoughts chained against the soul
holding me back from the flow
the river of heart
the lake of the mind
change me into ash on the wind
wretched stillness
spent now fallen on the horizon
these words spit out like mothers milk
I know that love will sometimes
change.

Feb. 9th

*Rant Alert* BEEP BEEP BEEP



Goddamn you Republicans, Catholic church, and your little dog too. Shut the fuck up about the contraceptive mandate. What is the matter with you people? How in the hell is making sure that poeple have access to free contraceptives an "assualt on religious freedom"? Your argument is pathetic. The mandate doesn't require anyone to be FORCED into using contraceptives, merely that they be available to those who want them. Stupid sons-of-bitches.

Yeah, it's politically inept of the Obama administration to out this out there for assault in an election year, but come on. Looking at the orange bastard John Boehner railing on the floor of the House yesterday against the mandate made me sick. It's such a stupid issue to raise when we have an economy still in shambles, a war in Afghanistan that we're trying pull a USSR on, and people who can't get affordable health care to save their lives - sometimes quite literally. So Boehner and the rest of you hypocritical fucking political bandwagoners, stop giving me yet another reason to hate you and all organized religion. Just STFU.

Ok. Whew. Rant over. I feel much better now! :-D